JEBI Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I got married so that I can be autocorrected even when my phone is off.
←Rate | 02-24-2014 10:24 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel bad for my american friends... they only have 2 idiots to choose from in their elections...50/50 chance of getting it wrong...
←Rate | 11-05-2012 08:11 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon The two major causes of depression are: a) having a wife, and b) not having a wife.
←Rate | 10-08-2013 12:27 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife wanted a puppy .I didn't want a puppy . So we compromised and got a puppy...
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:22 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whipped cream is just shaving cream that does whatever it's girlfriend tells it to do...
←Rate | 04-06-2013 13:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you park in the 'C' section of the hospital parking lot...do you have to climb out of the sunroof?
←Rate | 04-30-2013 08:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My better half wants me to go to the store and pick up some spices...I told her"Ain't nobody got no thyme for that"...
←Rate | 03-06-2013 15:15 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I have a dream" - Martin Luther King jr "I have a drone" - Barrack Hussein Obama
←Rate | 01-21-2014 08:58 by JEBI Comments (1)  


   messageicon "Really???" - Barbie, the first time she saw Ken without pants
←Rate | 01-22-2014 15:48 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're undecided...vote for the one that held the most babies...
←Rate | 11-06-2012 09:08 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon With all the negativity on the internet lately its nice to Charlie Sheen is positive...
←Rate | 11-18-2015 17:51 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are like roads. They will take you to new places, they have beautiful curves, and I'm probably going to drive my car onto one soon.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 10:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your grandma's furniture is wrapped in plastic... Well it's probably because she's a squirter...
←Rate | 05-07-2013 15:10 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon This is the time of year when you can put mistletoe in your back pocket so that people who don't like you can kiss your...well you know...
←Rate | 11-29-2012 10:27 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I recently went to the dentist and he wanted to take a mould of my mouth. When he was done he didn't like the mould so he asked me to do it again. I said "WHAT?! I usually make a good first impression..."
←Rate | 10-16-2014 11:16 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I guess we know what the Pope is giving up for lent...being the Pope...
←Rate | 02-11-2013 15:34 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon The creator takes those who are strongest...so that those who are left behind have something to live up to. RIP Nelson Mandela
←Rate | 12-05-2013 20:16 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon iPhone 6 will be wider, but at my age, I'll tap anything...
←Rate | 01-21-2014 14:57 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If she can still walk after se x to make you a sammich... then you're doing it wrong...
←Rate | 11-27-2012 13:37 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just made Romney noodles Obama self : - /
←Rate | 11-06-2012 09:17 by JEBI Comments (0)  




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