Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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I found out that if you have an annoying song stuck in your head that you want to forget, listen to Don't Stop Believing by Journey and it go away. REALLY!! 
All syllogisms have three parts, therefore this is not a syllogism.
Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?
the superman of humility
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words ........... words will never f**king fail me !!!
The richest person is not the one who has the most,while he is the one who needs less.
even the dark is frightened of me !
This is what will happen if you look like me............(SMACK)
I hope whilst they are recalling all these BMW's for faulty brakes, they fix their indicators cause I havnt found a BMW working indicator when i'm on the road B***std's
how come Cheryl Cole is still using Ashley Coles last nite ,,,,what wrong with tweedy?
Life is painful, nasty and short... in my case it has only been painful and nasty.
sometimes picture you drowning then they laugh so hard then the people they hang out with thinks they're crazy
if you're tired of waiting...just count 1 to 100...if it's still not there, count 1 to 200... if it's still not there, just count 1 to 10... if still nothing happens, then accept the fact that it's not meant for you..
whatever I want too!!
Golfer oosthuizen has won the British Open. In his honor, his name will be used in the last round of the next National Spelling Bee.
has mistakenly used Axe Freeze in place of body wash and now everything is tingling!!
a Jerkwagon... sorry folks, it's true.......
Why does a pumpkin smile after being torn out its entrail ..
it in the Job Description for Bomb Maker you have to be a medical student ?
It rained today. I know this because I checked a few of the local outdoor web cams 