JEBI Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Sorry sir...but your wife didn't make it.. ) : Was it*sniff*...lack of prayers on facebook? D : Yes sir...i'm afraid it was... ( ._.)
←Rate | 04-24-2013 15:40 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just changed my relationship status from "left hand" to "right hand"...
←Rate | 04-18-2013 09:10 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon People in Vimy Ridge would say otherwise about the resolve and bravery of Canadians...
←Rate | 04-15-2013 20:04 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've seen enough episodes of "Cops" to know that you should avoid all people with blurry faces....
←Rate | 04-08-2013 12:35 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I haven't been able to stop crying since that stranger on the internet said that they didn't like me...
←Rate | 04-08-2013 08:19 by JEBI Comments (1)  


   messageicon Whipped cream is just shaving cream that does whatever it's girlfriend tells it to do...
←Rate | 04-06-2013 13:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1920: "May I have this dance?" 1950: "Want to go to the drive-in?" 1980: "What's your sign?" 2012: "Here's a picture of my p eni$."
←Rate | 04-06-2013 13:18 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just tried on a pair of skinny jeans and accidentally got my balls caught in the zipper and now I know the words to every Bruno Mars song....
←Rate | 04-04-2013 10:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you plant a block of Ramen noodles in the ground and water it with Bud Lite it will grow into a college student named Todd who loves MMA...
←Rate | 04-04-2013 10:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are like roads. They will take you to new places, they have beautiful curves, and I'm probably going to drive my car onto one soon.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 10:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girlfriend: No, you hang up... Me: (click)
←Rate | 03-24-2013 11:38 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women: When it comes to doggie style...men are behind you 100%
←Rate | 03-22-2013 13:47 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Does anyone know how much water I'm supposed to add to this baby powder, to make an infant?
←Rate | 03-20-2013 10:55 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I go from "Hard to get" to "Hard to get rid of" in 6 beers flat...
←Rate | 03-08-2013 14:36 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's brown and rhymes with snoop?.......................Dr Dre.
←Rate | 03-07-2013 13:47 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did."
←Rate | 03-07-2013 11:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My better half wants me to go to the store and pick up some spices...I told her"Ain't nobody got no thyme for that"...
←Rate | 03-06-2013 15:15 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon To the douchebag who pushed me out of the way of the baggage carousel, remember what goes around comes around....
←Rate | 03-06-2013 09:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dad when I grow up I want a twitter account…I’m sorry son you can’t do both…
←Rate | 03-01-2013 08:14 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Putting Vodka in my juice because it's Russia somewhere...
←Rate | 03-01-2013 08:13 by JEBI Comments (0)  




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