smeebert Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Last night I got so drunk I blacked out for two hours, but then I realized I’d just put my hoodie on backwards
←Rate | 03-16-2014 23:59 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can get away with anything at Costco if you wear a hairnet
←Rate | 03-17-2014 00:05 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon World Cup Soccer reminds me of poor mans hockey
←Rate | 06-26-2014 02:25 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon To the Maverick detective - Jim Rockford, RIP James Garner
←Rate | 07-20-2014 10:35 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon I told you a million times do not exaggerate!
←Rate | 07-28-2014 09:49 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon We had it all Just like Bogie and Bacall Sailing away to Key Largo Here's lookin' at you kid RIP
←Rate | 08-12-2014 22:57 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon for once I'd like to see "Its been a crappy year, mainly cause your were part of it"
←Rate | 12-27-2014 00:22 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got back from a third world country - I got my box full of Seattle Seahawks 49th Superbowl champions shirt suckers...
←Rate | 02-04-2015 19:12 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon selfies are so last year, this year it's othies
←Rate | 02-06-2015 23:04 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it a serial killer could be chasing a person thru the airport and no one would even bat an eye
←Rate | 05-25-2015 18:58 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well about time I get in line for that Star Wars movie
←Rate | 12-09-2015 03:08 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some things need no improving, three stooges for instsn
←Rate | 01-05-2016 10:41 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ozzy should not have forgotten to tell Sharon Happy Mothers day
←Rate | 05-08-2016 16:49 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon i can't believe it, Morley Safer tribute was on last week and not 60 minutes later he's gone
←Rate | 05-19-2016 15:07 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guess what my doctor said I'm physically fit to become the next president of the United States!
←Rate | 09-15-2016 16:40 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon "My vote is for sale. Anyone want to one up Madonna? I'm taking offers..."
←Rate | 10-20-2016 22:15 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon We are building a fence and I'm gonna make my neighbors pay for it.
←Rate | 01-29-2017 14:23 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon If someone gave me a million dollars to lose weight for one of those weight loss programs I would too
←Rate | 01-20-2018 12:39 by Smeebert Comments (1)  


   messageicon First time I’ve been up early for Saturday morning cartoons in awhile.
←Rate | 04-07-2018 12:01 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon 100th episode of undercover boss is on and your telling me there are still people out that aren’t suspicious of a camera crew filming them at work. Working on my sob story to tell
←Rate | 08-21-2018 22:24 by Smeebert Comments (0)  




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