J. BIAZA Funny Status Messages

   I only make mental bets and coincidentally I've lost my mind.

   People who persevere are annoying to the rest of us who'd rather quit and go drink.

   You'd think that after all these years of practice I'd be good at waking up by now.

   I'm thinking about becoming a psychic...But I don't know what people would think.

   Wanna feel confident and attractive? Me too! Let's all get drunk!

   If my death is as extraordinary as my life... then I should go quietly in my sleep.

   Todays Thing To Do: Make a To-Do list.

   I am on hold. My call is important to them.

   Creating creative statuses is one of the many habits of highly effective people!

   I'm kinda bored...I think I'm gonna go hang this 'No U-Turn' sign in a cul-de-sac somewhere.

   Sometimes I think that life is one big test...and I'm in the wrong classroom.

   I don't know about y'all but every time I see that Direct TV commercial...I really want a miniature giraffe.

   ‎"Be excellent to each other." ~ Bill S. Preston Esquire & Ted "Theodore" Logan

   There has gotta be a better use for the part of my brain that remembers all the words to 'Baby Got Back'.

   When you start smoking beers and drinking cigarettes its time to quits call it.