@gnarleycharley Funny Status Messages

   I went to Chick-fil-a for lunch...You have to try the Chick on Chick sandwich...

   I have been watching that new reality show on the History channel...I had no idea that Bill Paxton hated Kevin Costner....

   Hey bartender, that piña colada you just made taste like SPF 40!

    I might be  a 3XL at the mall, but I'm only a petite at "The Big and Tall Store"

   I think Mitt Romney should pick Hologram Tupac for his running mate..

   ChrEasters people who only go to church on Christmas & Easter

   NEWS FLASH: Dodgers announce opening-day promotion: first 1000 fans get a set of "HIV & HER" bathroom towels

   When I win the Mega Millions...The first order of business is buy the company I work for. Second, fire myself and collect unemployment...double dipping

   I'm sooo tired I spent all night reenacting scenes from Platoon with Charlie Sheen

   Apparently, the answer to WWJD is ……hire Peyton Manning.

   The legend goes that St. Danica Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland.....must be hard to put all the tiny seat belts on all the snakes.

   I'm so crazy I'm thinking about springing forward right now....see you in an hour!

   Quote from the movie Project X..."That guys so old he probably graduated in 1986"..ouch .I'm frickin Dinosaur...  

   What does Whitney Houston and Madonna and me have in common ... All of us didn't sing at the Super Bowl this year .

   accidentally ordered the Chewbaco at Jack in the Box…it's terrible I found a huge hair in my wookie taco.

   What do you think i'm some kind of Summoner?

   Captain Crunch of the Italian cruise liner just invited Billy Cundiff to his Super Bowl party!

   I just cooked vegetables on my Foreman Grill....is that even legal....I feel dirty..

   Kids don't like meatloaf…but add some candles kids love meat cake….

   declaring 2012 is the year of the Honey Badger! Google  "Crazy Nastyass Honey Badger"