MC Fazzerino Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Holiday Tip #236: When hosting a covered dish holiday dinner where everyone brings something, never put a skinny person in charge of desserts.
←Rate | 11-29-2013 18:19 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy Hoildays Schmolidays. Merry Christmas Schmistmas. I lean towards the Christmas greeting, but I gotta be honest with myself. I don't care. I'm mainly in it for the food.
←Rate | 12-07-2013 16:51 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Music, Children, and Dogs: The world's three greatest anti-depressants.
←Rate | 12-10-2013 07:32 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Breaking News! You can "QUIETLY" be an Atheist and leave people who believe in something more substantial, believable, reasonable, realistic and is NOT a mere product of mental invention......Learn to stay in your lane dummies.
←Rate | 12-19-2013 06:04 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (7)  


   messageicon Science can't figure out whether an egg is good or bad for you, let alone accurately prove how the universe formed or evolution.
←Rate | 12-19-2013 06:06 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (1)  


   messageicon Most places claiming to have Real New York Pizza usually don't. It's more like: "Real Upstate New York Pizza."
←Rate | 12-23-2013 09:35 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thanks to 0bamacare, Americans can expect to earn six figure salaries in 2014. Okay, six figures if you count the decimal point, the zeroes that follow the decimal point, and the dollar sign.
←Rate | 01-03-2014 08:10 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone tried to steal my identity. However, after reviewing my bank accounts and credit information, they felt sorry for me and offered me theirs.
←Rate | 01-13-2014 15:31 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon No, no....when I Poked you on facebook, it wasn't a friendly tap on the shoulder. It was thinly veiled suggestion for my wanting to f**k your brains out.
←Rate | 01-14-2014 14:52 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Instead of, "Who won?" The most frequently asked question at Super Bowl 48 will be, "Hey, are you gonna eat the rest of those nachos?"
←Rate | 01-20-2014 10:40 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just got a great deal on a dairy cow. It's lactose intolerant.
←Rate | 01-28-2014 16:55 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Music is no longer an art. It has become a commodity. As far as entertainment goes these days, there's very little difference between listening to music and buying wheat.
←Rate | 05-02-2014 19:36 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Damn hard of hearing pharmacist. I had trouble sleeping so I asked for Nytol. He gave me Mydol. So here I am, wide awake, but I have to admit the cramps and bloating are gone.
←Rate | 06-02-2014 07:01 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing says, "creative genius" like posting, "Good Morning!" with a cup of coffee with a smiley in the foam.
←Rate | 06-02-2014 15:20 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  



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