KIsstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I've been knocking for ten minutes. Don't people answer their bathroom windows anymore?
←Rate | 10-15-2011 02:45 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't tell me to make myself at home if you don't want me to drop my pants and download porn on your computer.
←Rate | 10-15-2011 02:09 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Things people say after watching a movie: 5% - I can't wait for the sequel. 5% - That was a great movie 5% - that's was a complete waste of money 85% - I gotta pee.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 03:09 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon High Heels are a man's invention to make it harder for a woman to run away.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 02:55 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Please don't take anything I say personal or too seriously. I'm just an idiot with internet access.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 14:41 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon A burp is just a fart that took the elevator.
←Rate | 10-09-2011 05:25 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon 3 Jobs that changed the world: HAND, BLOW and STEVE!
←Rate | 10-08-2011 14:22 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Three Apples changed the world. The first one tempted Eve, the second inspired Newton and the third was offered to the world half eaten by Steve Jobs. RIP
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:29 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon A pregnant prostitute went to a doctor and he asked, “Do you know who the father is?” She replied, “Well, if you ate a can of baked beans, do you know which one made you fart?”
←Rate | 10-05-2011 12:50 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon A man asked a prostitute, “How much is one round?” The Prostitute replies,"100 on the bed, 50 on the sofa and 20 on the floor. The man gives her 100 and the Prostitute says, 'Wow a classy guy' The man replies, “classy my a$$, I want 5 times on the
←Rate | 10-05-2011 04:51 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not everyone who plays with you is on your team.
←Rate | 10-05-2011 00:12 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon I get offended when people assume I think and care about them.Who died and made you money?
←Rate | 10-05-2011 00:08 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its my birthday today and I am feeling so special even the supermarket doors are opening by themselves when they see me coming through.
←Rate | 09-29-2011 03:01 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon That uneasy moment when you realise Facebook has made more CHANGES than OBAMA.
←Rate | 09-25-2011 12:20 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is pain, and anyone who says otherwise is trying to sell you something.
←Rate | 09-25-2011 12:08 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Condoms should change to different colors according to whatever disease they come in contact with.
←Rate | 09-23-2011 15:57 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon The moment you stop giving a damn is the moment things get easier and better.
←Rate | 09-23-2011 00:57 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love doesn't cost a thing; except tears, a broken heart, wasted years and half your stuff.
←Rate | 09-21-2011 02:33 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon A COMPLICATED RELATIONSHIP is born when the KING of mixed signals hooks up with the QUEEN of second thoughts.
←Rate | 09-11-2011 04:50 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies: Never make an important decision while you're on your period.
←Rate | 09-09-2011 17:33 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  




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