Snotty Funny Status Messages
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Well,,,, If you count watching Elmer Fudd singing "Kill The Wabbit," Then yes, I've been to the opera.
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09-09-2013 21:22 by snotty
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I just opened the dryer door & a quarter fell out and rolled underneath it, so I guess I just opened myself a savings account.
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05-22-2013 20:23 by snotty
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anybody gonna mention the fact that the Mayans couldn't even predict the Spanish coming?
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12-12-2012 13:20 by snotty
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Wearing my pajamas to Walmart. I don't want to attract any attention.
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02-24-2013 21:05 by snotty
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Oh I'm sorry.. I didn't know it was "bring your feelings to work day".
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09-27-2012 16:13 by snotty
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And for all of you who are Telepathic...............
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11-08-2012 18:30 by snotty
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Wait,,,, What does it mean when my bride uses air quotes during the vows???
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03-06-2014 18:34 by snotty
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Pro Tip ~~ Do not make popcorn in laundromat dryers.. It really affects the flavor.
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11-10-2013 17:05 by snotty
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Sometimes I wish there was a rollover plan for naps I didn't take when I was a kid
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01-11-2016 20:24 by snotty
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I use a remote control for my car stereo because,,,,, Well,, You know,,,,, Who would EVER want to lean forward a little bit?...
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07-01-2012 07:32 by snotty
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I don't know alot about history,,, but I know Marco Polo was definitely the most annoying swimmer of all the famous explorers.
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03-27-2012 13:43 by snotty
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After 31 free samples,, I decided I wasn't really in the mood for Baskin Robins
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05-12-2013 15:37 by snotty
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It's not difficult to tell crocodiles and alligators apart. One will see you in a while whereas the other will see you later.
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04-06-2015 19:06 by snotty
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I'm old enough to remember when cell phones actually got smaller every year.
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03-31-2014 07:18 by snotty
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Things that don't kill bees: 1: furnutire polish 2: Febreeze 3: butter 4: screeming
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10-28-2013 17:53 by snotty
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I'm sure the guy standing at the urinal next to me, regrets wearing those flip flops today.
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09-01-2014 10:25 by snotty
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You gotta go for personality, guys.... They'll ALL look like grandma someday,,
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04-11-2012 06:54 by snotty
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I've said it before and I'll say it again: I've said it before and I'll say it again.
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04-14-2012 08:48 by snotty
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I never realized my dog has the same last name as me until I took him to the vet... what are the odds?
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10-19-2014 19:28 by snotty
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I don't like using public restrooms,,,, Mostly because I've seen the public.
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11-10-2012 21:58 by snotty
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