StonerDudee Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'StonerDudee': View All Messages
Page: 21 of 28

   messageicon I assume guys who wear their phones on the hip do so because their pockets are stuffed to the brim with condoms and girls phone numbers
←Rate | 11-07-2013 21:27 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon My d*ck was in the Guinness Book of World Records but then the librarian told me to take it out
←Rate | 11-14-2013 16:22 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Think of a number between 1 and 10. Add your area code. Subtract your age. Add some common sense. What are you even doing with your life?
←Rate | 11-26-2013 01:34 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon No one thinks the screenshot of your text messages are as funny as you do. No one
←Rate | 11-26-2013 01:35 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon If one door closes & another door opens, you're probably in prison.
←Rate | 11-26-2013 01:36 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I let a Jehovahs Witness in my home, I sat him down and said, 'what do you have to tell me?' he said, 'I don't know, never made it this far'
←Rate | 11-26-2013 01:37 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man found hanged in his flat, 8 years after committing suicide. Sort of proves his point, really
←Rate | 11-26-2013 01:42 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before you decide to spend less time on social media, make sure you go to every social media website and tell everyone.
←Rate | 12-27-2013 16:46 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She replied, "S3x! S3x! S3x! Free s3x tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 6663629."
←Rate | 12-28-2013 10:38 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only way I know if I've bought enough beer is if my car thinks I have a passenger
←Rate | 01-01-2014 11:34 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dwayne Johnson, paper, scissors
←Rate | 01-01-2014 11:39 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel bad for lions at zoos. How would you feel if a bunch of pizzas came to your house, took your picture, and you couldn't even eat them?
←Rate | 01-01-2014 11:42 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just drove by an Asian restaurant - Wok n' Roll - well played Chinese people. So crever
←Rate | 01-03-2014 11:01 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Moving all my retirement funds into a Colorado snack machine franchise.
←Rate | 01-03-2014 11:03 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the lion wasn't a coward and the Scarecrow had a brain, they would have warned the Tinman that he was better off without a heart.
←Rate | 01-09-2014 00:31 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I asked for a glass of cold water from my drunk af friend I found him with a cup in the microwave. I told him "I said cold water whys it in the microwave?" He replied "we didn't have any cold water, so I'm melting ice for you" l
←Rate | 01-10-2014 00:25 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not judgmental, so when I see a person driving slow in the fast lane, I never assume what gender she is
←Rate | 01-10-2014 18:27 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate guys who are like "your dating my ex? Hope you like leftovers" like wtf, haven't you had cold pizza the next day? It's the best
←Rate | 01-10-2014 18:28 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Orgy was going well until I realized it was an intervention
←Rate | 01-10-2014 18:29 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Swiss must've been pretty confident in their chances of victory if they included a corkscrew in their army knife.
←Rate | 01-10-2014 18:32 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left