smeebert Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Terrorists are like salmon, life is good until the seals show up
←Rate | 06-12-2011 20:38 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon finally its Jail for Whitey Bulger, brings a new meaning to tighty Whitey
←Rate | 06-23-2011 04:57 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon What good is one phone call in jail if they won't let me use my cell to find the number, no one remembers phone numbers these days!
←Rate | 06-27-2011 23:26 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon went to a movie tonight with 18 blonds!!! they said because 18 and under was not allowed
←Rate | 07-08-2011 02:44 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kate plus eight is being cancelled, I think we can all together say eight times....thank God!
←Rate | 08-15-2011 23:34 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Celebrities of old had talent and class! Why then are the likes of the Kardashians and Hiltons considered celebrities when they have neither?
←Rate | 08-20-2011 12:35 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon my sleep number is 80 proof
←Rate | 08-31-2011 20:37 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon In memory of 9/11 I am teaching my kids the pledge of allegiance like everyone was taught when I was a kid
←Rate | 09-11-2011 02:14 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just watched 'Pan Am" ….. Now there's an example where the union seniority killed the industry, all those lovely stewardesses are now old flight attendants
←Rate | 09-26-2011 02:11 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I were a midget I would so score candy on Halloween
←Rate | 09-27-2011 20:29 by Smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon We should feed tuna fish mayonnaise, thereby saving a step in the sandwich making process
←Rate | 10-13-2011 21:51 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thank you hot syrupy flavor, every morning I wake to savor, I drink you with one eye sleepy that fact I can rhyme this early is kinda creepy
←Rate | 11-02-2011 11:01 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon my kids enjoy the free cardboard box and balloons the most
←Rate | 11-06-2011 18:07 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon 11 was quite a popular number. Next year it'll be all about 12
←Rate | 11-12-2011 04:36 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Thanksgiving dinner price highest in 20 years” PLAN: I'm putting together a list of Thanksgiving invites......stop in say hi, hug everyone, grab a plate and go to next house, cheapest Thanksgiving in 20 years!
←Rate | 11-23-2011 23:42 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dreamt I was forced to eat my way out of a ginger bread house
←Rate | 12-04-2011 11:21 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Alec Baldwin wouldn't have been booted from the plane today if he played the part of the pilot
←Rate | 12-07-2011 00:02 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Brees created quite the Hurricane in New Orleans tonight
←Rate | 12-26-2011 23:58 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon hors d'oevures now there is a word that snooty people like to use regularly, most of us just say "snacks" and we survive the holidays just fine.
←Rate | 12-28-2011 01:21 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow I guess David didn't beat Goliath, Tim Tebow did... what a game.
←Rate | 01-09-2012 01:19 by smeebert Comments (0)  




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