nunthewizr Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon As a white person, I was offended on just how "white" the cast in Twilight Eclipse were.
←Rate | 06-30-2010 11:46 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever try to take a Barbie out of it's packaging??? What, is she going to escape? Is she into bondage?
←Rate | 07-12-2010 20:58 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I say "I understand", it doesn't mean I agree, it doesn't mean I understand, it doesn't even mean I'm listening.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:03 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men - Alcohol impairs your ability to make good decisions. We don't want you to lose that ability... we want her to.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:07 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd tap that...Haha....kidding I wouldn't even poke that on Facebook.
←Rate | 07-19-2010 08:35 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do they put slow cashiers on the speedy checkouts?
←Rate | 07-27-2010 14:06 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to play "Rodeo Cowboy" with my girlfriend. Whenever we're making love and I'm behind her, I call her by a different name and see how long I can hold on.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:21 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Suppose I should get a girlfriend. Yep, I'm almost out of cologne.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:38 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can be the only guy at Walmart at two in the morning but as soon as I whip that box of Tampax on the belt, the checkout line is full and they do a price check.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do they always staff the slowest cashier at the express lanes at Walmart?
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:19 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know why some girls refuse to use a porta-potty. It's not like us men pee on the seat on purpose...geesh:)
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (1)  


   messageicon There's no such thing as being "big boned." How many fat skeletons have you ever seen???
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:46 by Nunthewizr Comments (1)  


   messageicon it me or are 75% of the people that use handicap parking spots not suffering from a handicap at all???
←Rate | 07-27-2010 22:21 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may think I'm dumb but you over estimate me.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 21:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon One of the best parts about Saturday and Sunday mornings is reading the Status Updates people post after a night of drinking.
←Rate | 08-28-2010 19:51 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay...someone explain this to me. You have five urinals in a public restroom and are using the one all the way at the end. Someone walks in and....out of the four other available urinals, decides to "neighbor pee" in the one next to you......WTH?!?
←Rate | 09-09-2010 17:31 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Would it be good news or bad news if your Girlfriend told you that she was already married???
←Rate | 09-09-2010 17:33 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tattoo on the lower back? Might as well be a bullseye.
←Rate | 09-21-2010 22:09 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to date a girl with an accent. Well....maybe just a really slow girl that sounds like she has an accent. I'm not picky:)
←Rate | 09-22-2010 17:06 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever accidentally pull something out of your purse thinkin it was a pen when checking out?? Yep, that's how my days goin...
←Rate | 10-14-2010 21:00 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  




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