Kisstopher Funny Status Messages

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Page: 17 of 35

   messageicon Whats the definition of a tree? Something that stands still for forty years then suddenly jumps out in front of a woman driver.
←Rate | 04-21-2012 08:20 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm black but not "ain't nobody got time for that" black.
←Rate | 05-19-2013 11:00 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. A lot of animals do things. It is not our place to judge.
←Rate | 09-27-2012 02:29 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon Ever just apologize for no reason whatsoever? No? It must be nice being single.
←Rate | 05-13-2013 09:16 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon If I were a Caveman I would have masturbated in front of a T-Rex just to make him jealous!
←Rate | 03-21-2013 08:32 by Kisstopher Comments (1)  

   messageicon Excuse me guys, help here. What does it mean if the husband of a woman you have been flirting with on Facebook sends you a friend request? Am I in trouble? Should I be worried?
←Rate | 06-06-2011 13:38 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon Don't be pushed around by your problems; be led by your courage.
←Rate | 08-16-2011 13:30 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon When a woman says "I can't get laid" we all know she's just being damn picky.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 08:17 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon I miss being late for work because of morning sex. Now, it's because I dress my cat as Gandolph.
←Rate | 03-01-2013 00:38 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon People hate the truth. Luckily, the truth doesn't care.
←Rate | 12-06-2012 01:09 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon Whoever '' Shawty'' is , she apparently has alot of rapper boyfriends.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 13:37 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon I can’t control you're being an idiot, but I can control whether or not you’re on my friends list.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 14:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon A burp is just a fart that took the elevator.
←Rate | 10-09-2011 05:25 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon If it was up to me, Pregnancy test would only have 2 cool results; PINK - You are screwed & BLUE - Keep on screwing.
←Rate | 05-11-2011 13:27 by KIsstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon A friend got mugged coming out of K-Mart and is devastated. I feel the same way because I had no idea I knew people that shopped there.
←Rate | 09-26-2012 14:28 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon She blinded me with science. Fine, it was mace, but she sprayed it very scientifically.
←Rate | 10-02-2012 09:01 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon Its my birthday today and I am feeling so special even the supermarket doors are opening by themselves when they see me coming through.
←Rate | 09-29-2011 03:01 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon I always bring some wire cutters to parties, just in case someone else brings a guitar.
←Rate | 12-02-2011 14:06 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  

   messageicon Remember when I loved you unconditionally? Well the terms of that arrangement have changed.
←Rate | 10-10-2012 04:24 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

   messageicon News Reporter: "So what inspired you to work with Chris Brown?" Rihanna: "Beats me..."
←Rate | 03-03-2012 13:37 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  

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