Abraham lincoln Funny Status Messages
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For the first time ever Women's IQ test scores are higher than Men's!......But to keep it fair they didn't include the ''Blondes'' scores!!!
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I will not chase you after anyone anymore!.......If you walk out of my life, I'll hold the F-N door open for you!!!
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hahahahahahahahaha=very funy hahahahaha=funny haha=not that funny
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When you break something at the store and nervously walk away!
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Remember when you were younger that old guy at the pool that swam laps and yelled at all the kids to get off the ropes!!!
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If Monday hd a face......I would knock the $h!t out of it!!!
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Michael Vick announced that he is probably going to get another Dog soon! Dogs now are like ''Meow!''
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It takes 42 muscles for you to frown! But only four for me to extend my middle finger to you! Fck off!!!
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I would be the worst 911 Operator! ''Excuse me ma'am, I think you mean 'The Robber is over there!' Not over their or over they're!!''
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There needs to be a phone-line to Heaven.....for the one's we miss!!!
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The villian in the new batman movie is named ''Bain''........I know that Obama has something to do with this!!!
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You know your ''OLD'' when your age is higher than the whole Womens Olympic Gymnastic Team!!!
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Life is like a roll of toilet paper....The closer it gets to the end the faster it spins!!!
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Saying ''Oh Yeah, I remember!'' when you have no idea what their talking about!
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Women are just like Hurricanes, because when they come they're wet & wild! And when they leave they're taking the house and car!!!
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I hate when I accidently run my hand over a piece of gum stuck under a desk!
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II wish the XXX Olympics gave medals for the ''Clean and Jerk''
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I'm sex..unattractive and I know it!
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I walked into the Dentist's office and he asked me what the problem was and I said ''Doc, I think I'm a Giant Moth!'' He said ''You need a Psychiatrist not a Dentist, why did you come in here?'' I told him ''The light was on!!!''
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Went for a jog tonight and saw a payphone and I was like ''WTF is that!!!''
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