Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Everything I know about dancing I learned from the Charlie Brown Christmas play
←Rate | 11-28-2022 04:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you bought a fruitcake this past weekend, you have until March 2035 to eat it.
←Rate | 11-28-2022 04:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't forget that today is "small business Saturday" so only subscribe to OnlyFans accounts in your town
←Rate | 11-26-2022 02:27 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Damn, Girl. Are you Black Friday? 'Cause I'm wondering what your deal is.
←Rate | 11-25-2022 19:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girlfriend asked me if I seen the dog bowl. I said no but that would be very interesting.
←Rate | 11-24-2022 10:29 by Curly Comments (0)  


   messageicon I accidentally took my cats meds this morning... Don't ask meow.
←Rate | 11-23-2022 20:29 by Curly Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Enjoy the warm glow of family and friends this holiday season." ~ crematorium slogan.
←Rate | 11-22-2022 22:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We live in a " paper straw wrapped in plastic" kind of world. It's all stupid
←Rate | 11-22-2022 21:48 by Cyndi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just heard a commercial on the radio that said your hair loss has to do with your jeans. I guess that's why I still have all my hair. Because I don't wear jeans.
←Rate | 11-22-2022 15:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The gateway to "make up sex" is arguing. Go start a good argument and then give in for the reward.
←Rate | 11-22-2022 08:54 by hubba Comments (0)  



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