Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon "Nice try. That isn't what Trump said. He never said he didn’t know about it. He said "No" when asked if he was briefed on it. That's two completely different things." Dumbest comment I've seen here yet LMAOOOOO
←Rate | 03-27-2025 20:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Når verden er for stor Og stien er alt for bratt Kan du vende blikket mot Nord Selv I denne mørke natt
←Rate | 06-02-2022 12:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Would boiling water in a balloon work in a water balloon fight? Asking for a friend 
←Rate | 06-18-2023 18:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm trying to eat healthier. Do dinosaur chicken nuggets count as a vegetable?
←Rate | 07-20-2021 00:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon make me a discord status for my friends ex. they did a lot of bad stuff like hurting people and wanting e-sex
←Rate | 06-23-2024 23:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon He not give flying f*ck about your military. Which make our job so much easier in end. Россия навсегда
←Rate | 03-27-2025 20:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Waltz claims the journalist number must've gotten "sucked" into his phone. He then asked Siri, "How can I suck the journalist off?" Such an amazing clownshow. So much comedy. So much humor. Thank you rapeublicans for this amazing gift 😂
←Rate | 03-30-2025 19:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok Jack Frost! You need to quit playing freeze tag with Elsa and Subzero from Mortal Kombat. Because you all keep missing each other, and it is starting to affect the rest of us.
←Rate | 01-30-2023 10:53 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon But the baby bear said, "My porridge is just right. My porridge is just right." That bear's repeating.
←Rate | 08-25-2023 12:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon After A Heavy Night Of Drinking, I Took A Bus Home. That Might Not Be A Big Deal To Some Of You, But It Was The First Time I'd Driven One.
←Rate | 06-26-2024 12:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What up?
←Rate | 03-30-2025 19:18 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my coworker is getting beat up, better believe I'm jumping in to help. Because I ain't covering anybody's shift.
←Rate | 01-07-2025 05:38 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Auto pen: your 2028 Dem candidate.
←Rate | 03-16-2025 08:45 by TDSisReal Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yeh. He's definitely a Canuck.
←Rate | 03-30-2025 13:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ends? You call that lunch?
←Rate | 05-16-2023 20:26 by Dagwood Comments (0)  


   messageicon GaryKoenig needs to seriously go f**k himself
←Rate | 03-10-2025 09:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your country is toast.
←Rate | 03-14-2025 10:00 by Russia Comments (0)  


   messageicon Press 2 for English. "2"... AT&T Rep: "Dank you fur coling AD&D."
←Rate | 03-16-2025 07:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Exactly! The more they try to come at me, the stronger I get and the harder I laugh at them.
←Rate | 03-26-2025 19:42 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon GaryBlownig... you steal so well.
←Rate | 03-27-2025 16:53 Comments (0)  




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