Snotty Funny Status Messages



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Page: 76 of 160

   messageicon Lately, I have really begun to appreciate the versatility of the word "asshat".
←Rate | 11-13-2013 12:01 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope the next Rambo movie is called 'Rambo No. 5' and its just Stallone dancing through the jungle shooting a little bit of this and that.
←Rate | 11-13-2013 11:57 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should think about donating blood,,,,, All of it
←Rate | 11-13-2013 11:54 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon He was so creepy, his van had a basement.
←Rate | 11-12-2013 21:32 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon NEWS FLASH: The mother who injected her 8 year old daughter with Botox looses custody... *The child didn't look surprised.
←Rate | 11-12-2013 17:09 by snotty Comments (1)  


   messageicon *Buys a 3D printer... *With the 3D printer, prints a 3D printer... *Returns the origional 3D printer
←Rate | 11-12-2013 16:26 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wiki leaks: kraby patty secret formula
←Rate | 11-12-2013 16:10 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I Just watched guy put a wheel barrow in his shopping cart at the Home Depot.... *I'm just going to let that sit here and sink in.*
←Rate | 11-10-2013 17:45 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today, I found a potato chip that looked exactly like Jesus.. Then I remembered nobody knows what Jesus actually looked like... So I ate it.
←Rate | 11-10-2013 17:42 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's like my father used to say "Go get that rock over there... I promise I won't drive away this time."
←Rate | 11-10-2013 17:38 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pro Tip ~~ Do not make popcorn in laundromat dryers.. It really affects the flavor.
←Rate | 11-10-2013 17:05 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you didn't go to my sporting events growing up,,,,,, you're dad to me.
←Rate | 11-10-2013 16:44 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Home Depot should sell replacement drywall in pre-cut pieces about as big as a fist,, and ironically call them "drunk angry dad size.".. *I'm sad now*
←Rate | 11-10-2013 08:10 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mom & Dad,,,Summer Camp looks a lot like a WalMart parking lot.. Also,, Is it usually six months long?... Love Billy
←Rate | 11-10-2013 08:05 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon If it weren't for marriage,,, men would spend their lives thinking they had no faults at all.
←Rate | 11-10-2013 08:03 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon ZOMBIE FART JOKE: Pull off my finger.
←Rate | 11-09-2013 20:38 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon 911 What's your emergency?.. "I JUST FARTED ON A FIRST DATE"... Sir, we don't... "BUT IT SOUNDED LIKE A BALLOON ANIMAL ASKING A QUESTION"
←Rate | 11-08-2013 18:47 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just used a full size twix bar to stir my coffee.... *If I ever forget my passport, this post doubles as proof of U.S. citizenship.*
←Rate | 11-07-2013 17:10 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon that a thesaurus in your pocket?,, Or are you just ebullient to see me?
←Rate | 11-07-2013 16:51 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Amazon: If you spend $17 more dollars, we'll knock off the $3 shipping fee.. Me: You've got yourself a deal, Amazon.... Every- Single- Time.
←Rate | 11-07-2013 16:50 by snotty Comments (0)  




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