urboyblue Funny Status Messages

   I am either going to hell or the rapture was a hoax!!

   If the rapture is Saturday...I hope the Lord knows that I was listening to the preacher while colorin'

   My neighbor tried...BUT it is impossible to look cool while holding onto a leash attached to a dog who is taking a crap!!

   I got a funny cigarette and a $2 bottle of wine and a beautiful blonde with me tonight!! Life can't get no sweeter!!

   I don't think an athiest has the right to listen to "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey!! Go listen to "Nothing Happens When You Die" and whine on your message boards!!

   We have a game show called Survivor in America....you can win 1 million dollars for doing something for 2 weeks that most people on this planet call "life"!! It simply amazes me how spoiled, ungrateful and lazy we are!!

   If you have a mom or wife that is an awesome mother don't post it here....get ur lazy ass up and go tell her in person!!

   Cinco de Mayo....not 1 yard will be mowed today!!

   Don't wear the label people give you!! They only know you're name and not your story and one day eventually some of them will end up having to kiss your ass!!

   When I see a kid about 4 - 7 years old with a mullet I can almost guarantee you there is a meth lab at his house and I would just like to go smack his parents!!

   Rory's got a Tiger on his ass and he lookin like a Wildebeest!!

   If I ever get arrested, do I have a good enough friend to come to my house and clear my browseer before they can obtain the search warrant??

   Geez O pete's just legalize marijauna already...just for the simple fact that stoner's won't have anything else to talk about, ever!!

   Don't you just hate those skinny ass Barbie type girls that always says "I'm fat"!! I would love to go "not now but keep actin' like your actin' and you will be after those 7 kids you're gonna have" Anyone else feel this way??

   God....if you give us back Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings or Freddie Mercury, we'll give You Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga in return, Amen!!

   I wish Doc would hurry up with that Flux Capacitor so we don't have to pay these ridiculous f&^kin' gas prices!!

   Looks like Mr. T and Flav O Flav had a baby and he is one of the Black Eyed Peas!!

   it wrong when your pubic hair is longer than your pubic?