lemonpillow Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Morning without coffee is like sleep.
←Rate | 03-09-2010 03:53 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Procrastination has it's good side. You always have something to do tomorrow.
←Rate | 03-08-2010 15:20 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every once in a brownish-purple moon, I worry that I might be colorblind.
←Rate | 03-08-2010 15:17 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Keep smiling. But not to the point where people begin to think you're mentally unbalanced.
←Rate | 03-07-2010 03:27 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon My laziness is becoming such a issue that I can't even be bothered hanging my clothes on my treadmill anymore
←Rate | 03-06-2010 15:45 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I said "I wanted to be held" I didn't mean "by the Authorities".
←Rate | 03-05-2010 16:50 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you need space then work at NASA.
←Rate | 03-05-2010 03:37 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Naomi Campbell should take up golf because she's really good at hitting the driver.
←Rate | 03-05-2010 02:10 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon March 4th. I like today's date because it's like i'm telling people what to do.
←Rate | 03-04-2010 09:55 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon ..when people write "is ;-)" as their stat message,you tend to think,well,if I was ";-)" would I stop and write a stat update about it? Obviously you're not ";-)" very well.
←Rate | 03-03-2010 17:49 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Definition of mixed emotions: seeing your mother-in-law go over a cliff in your brand new Porsche.
←Rate | 03-03-2010 12:48 by Lemonpillow Comments (3)  


   messageicon Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? Because those that can run,jump and swim are already in the U.S.
←Rate | 03-03-2010 00:32 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do you call a lesbian with long fingernails? Single!
←Rate | 03-02-2010 15:18 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
←Rate | 03-02-2010 12:17 by Lemonpillow Comments (1)  


   messageicon My therapist just prescribed all new meds for my March madness.
←Rate | 03-02-2010 06:49 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want a search engine that will tell me where my keys are.
←Rate | 03-01-2010 13:05 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sow your wild oats on Saturday night. Then pray for crop failure on Sunday.
←Rate | 02-28-2010 17:00 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I smile because I don't know what's going on.
←Rate | 02-28-2010 16:26 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet curling atheletes have dirty houses. When they get home,they must think "Screw this. I do enough sweeping at work!"
←Rate | 02-27-2010 20:16 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I should really stop confusing sign language for kung-fu.
←Rate | 02-27-2010 13:40 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  




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