lemonpillow Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'lemonpillow': View All Messages
Page: 22 of 40

   messageicon When people say they've "tied the knot",they mean they got married. Or tied a knot around their neck. Which is the same thing anyways.
←Rate | 03-17-2010 23:46 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask "Mother,what was war?" -Eva Merriam.
←Rate | 03-17-2010 17:34 by lemonpillow Comments (1)  


   messageicon it just me, or are 80% of the people in the “people you may know” feature on facebook people that you do know, but deliberately choose not to be friends with?
←Rate | 03-17-2010 15:20 by lemonpillow Comments (9)  


   messageicon St. Patricks Day. The only time of the year when people are proud of having a bit of Irish in them.
←Rate | 03-17-2010 04:53 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon We are all time travelers moving at the speed of exactly 60 minutes per hour.
←Rate | 03-16-2010 15:24 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Polygram records,Warner Bros,and Keebler merged would the company be called Poly-Warner-Cracker?
←Rate | 03-16-2010 13:22 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say that three out of four Americans have a mental illness of some kind. Look at three of your friends. If they seem okay,then you're that person.
←Rate | 03-16-2010 13:18 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon You never really learn how to swear until you begin to drive.
←Rate | 03-16-2010 08:46 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon ..is off to spend some quality time with her gf. Be back in two minutes! :-)
←Rate | 03-16-2010 04:41 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon In just two days, tomor­row will be yes­ter­day!
←Rate | 03-15-2010 15:07 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.
←Rate | 03-15-2010 15:05 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon It may look like i'm doing nothing but at the cellular level i'm actually quite busy.
←Rate | 03-15-2010 06:23 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon So it's mothers day and I had trouble deciding what to get my mother-in-law I couldn't choose between a Toyota Prius or a holiday in Haiti, so eventually I plumped for luging lessons in Vancouver.
←Rate | 03-14-2010 07:04 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why did God create man? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.
←Rate | 03-13-2010 03:48 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
←Rate | 03-13-2010 03:37 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spent the whole day checking items off my task list. In retrospect, I probably should have used that time to complete tasks
←Rate | 03-12-2010 15:44 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Copywight 2010 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved.
←Rate | 03-12-2010 15:42 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon The other day I threw a boomerang at a ghost. I knew it would come back to haunt me.
←Rate | 03-12-2010 03:46 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in awhile,nine out of ten people would have nothing to talk about.
←Rate | 03-11-2010 08:13 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.
←Rate | 03-10-2010 17:13 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left