Snotty Funny Status Messages
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Wait !! Everybody stop posting,,,,, I dropped a contact lens
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04-06-2012 17:40 by snotty
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American Idol would be so much better if Statler and Waldorf from the Muppets were the judges.
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04-06-2012 17:37 by snotty
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It's a shame that Qatar's national airline is "Qatar Airways",, and not the far superior "Air Qatar".
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04-06-2012 17:35 by snotty
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My dog ate the garbage so told him he was bad,, He yelled "you're not my real dad!" and ran away ........ wait,, I don't have a dog
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04-06-2012 17:27 by snotty
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The Boston Red Sox are now offering peanut-free seating for fans with severe allergies... Sox officials said they want to make sure that gagging and choking only occur on the field
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04-06-2012 07:18 by snotty
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I know dream catchers don't work,, because I've never seen one in a car worth more than three thousand dollars.
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04-05-2012 20:38 by snotty
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I sit for 5 minutes laughing at my own tweet.. Then read it to my wife who looks at me in confusion...
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04-05-2012 18:36 by snotty
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Praise be unto Jesus,, owned so epically on the Cross so that we may not be similarly Owned & who on the 3rd day turned Epic Fail to epic Win
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04-05-2012 18:29 by snotty
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My favorite Easter tradition is when Uncle Gary starts giving everyone Stone Cold Stunners a half hour after the deviled eggs are gone.
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04-05-2012 16:57 by snotty
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And on the third day God created the beach,, so every 70's rock band would have a place to shoot their album cover.
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04-05-2012 16:33 by snotty
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I can't recall,,,Was the "power of Grayskull" 110v or 220v?
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04-05-2012 13:26 by snotty
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Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm backwards is mnbvcxzlkjhgfdsapoiuytrewq ,,,, Now 14% of you will proof this for accuracy,,, and then die alone.....Asses
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04-05-2012 13:23 by snotty
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Understand that the road to zombie hell is paved with absolutely good intestines.
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04-04-2012 18:40 by snotty
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If Apple had a nickle for every time an iPhone dropped it's connection they'd be one of the richest companies in the.......... Oh.
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04-04-2012 18:37 by snotty
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Wife: Do you want something for dinner?,, Me: What are my choices?,,, Wife: Yes or No.
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04-04-2012 18:33 by snotty
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Trouble's brewing at Symphony Hall.. It's the bottom of Beethoven's 9th,,, and the bassists are loaded.
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04-04-2012 18:29 by snotty
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Dyslexics better do it.
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04-04-2012 18:27 by snotty
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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash.. Now we have like 50 million dumb guys still posting a bad joke over and over
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04-04-2012 16:19 by snotty
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Ahem,,,,, Now As a recovering kleptomaniac,,,, I know how to take a joke.
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04-04-2012 07:20 by snotty
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Sometimes I worry my posts are too cerebrle... cerabrall... cerrebrel...
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04-03-2012 22:24 by snotty
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