huck Funny Status Messages

   I’m “you can only play video games on channel 3” years old.

   Superman wears glasses, everyone thinks he’s a different person. I wear glasses people say: “Hey, why are you wearing glasses?”

   Social media is perfect when you're feeling sorry for yourself and your desire is to feel worse.

   For no reason at all Smash Mouth's "All Star" is stuck in my head. I'm sorry to do this to you, but if I go down, we all go down.

   EMINEM: My symptoms: palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, and I threw up Mom's spaghetti WEB MD: you have cancer

   Let's be honest: The documentary they were making before the Blair Witch killed them would have sucked

   I have nothing in common with people who replace bread ties.

   I wear my heart on my sleeve. I wear my spleen on my pant leg. And my liver adds a certain flair to my belt.

   I got lost in your eyes...but I also get lost in most department stores, so I wouldn't read too much into it

   Thanksgiving tip #23: Call your dad now and ask him what the wifi password is so he has time to find the little paper it's written on before Thanksgiving.