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Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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It's so cold out that you can milk a cow and get instant ice cream.
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01-29-2023 13:08 by
GaryKoenig
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Cleaning
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01-29-2023 09:37
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Realtors are legally required to tell you if the house ghosts are too judgy
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01-29-2023 05:42
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MY WIFE DIVORCED ME BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T BELIEVE MY TESLA AUTODRIVES ME TO THE GAY BAR AND THEN TURNS ITSELF OFF, CAUSING ME TO HAVE TO SPEND 4 HOURS IN THERE ASKING FOR A RIDE HOME
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01-29-2023 05:40
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game over
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01-27-2023 20:14
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ask why
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01-27-2023 00:28
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ever ask why
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01-27-2023 00:28
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My wife got in the shower with me this morning. She said “Mmm baby I want you to do bad things to me. So I put shampoo in her eyes.
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01-26-2023 04:18
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Question, Can Happiness buy money?
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01-26-2023 04:01
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I'll be baby sitting this Valentine's Day $150 per kid. (inbox me)
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01-26-2023 03:59
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