Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 1000 of 6454

Eating pork chops with mohammad
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03-24-2017 19:52
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If Hillary won we would be under Sharia law. Bacon would be outlawed
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03-24-2017 19:22
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"A health care deal, his mouth, and his ties to Russia" - What are three things Donald Trump can't close?
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03-24-2017 18:01
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Obama claimed he was the one to bring the races together... Hows that working for ya BLM?
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03-24-2017 18:00
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At least I can sleep at night knowing the best person won the election.
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03-24-2017 16:42
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Went to buy a pack of smokes and this lady behind me says "you should really quit smoking".i said I know but I'm worried if I quit smoking I might start murdering. That shut her up pretty quick.lol
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03-24-2017 15:08
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Why would you schedule a vote on a bill that is at 17% approval? Have we forgotten everything Reagan taught us?
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03-24-2017 14:58
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You Matter!.... until you multiply yourself times the speed of light squared. Then you Energy!
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03-24-2017 14:39 by gil
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TOO bad we dont still have Obama as president... I'm sure a certain religon wants an apology for not having alot more people on the Westminster bridge
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03-24-2017 14:32
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Too bad the Russians couldn't influence the vote in the House today. Trump might have a chance to win if they could.
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03-24-2017 13:54
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"Judge me by what I say, not what I do" - the Art of the No Deal.
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03-24-2017 13:51
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In fairness to Trump, he thinks "vindicated" is a euphemism for getting peed on by a hooker.
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03-24-2017 13:50
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Does back-pedalling burn a lot of calories. If so, Trump and Spicer will have six pack abs by the end of today.
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03-24-2017 13:49
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A funny thing about tolerant people? They're only tolerant when you agree with them.
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03-24-2017 07:16
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It's easy to call it TrumpDontCare - so let's go with it.
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03-24-2017 05:21
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Trump is spending the entire day today fishing. For compliments.
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03-24-2017 05:18
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24 million would lose coverage under Trumpcare. But on the bright side... um...er...um... BENGHAZI!!!
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03-24-2017 05:14
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Thank God Obamacare is currently there to take care of those who have unnecessary heart palpitations over Trumpcare.
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03-24-2017 05:13
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President Trump's Favorite KFC Meal: The Suckers Bucket.
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03-24-2017 05:07
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If we keep killing entitlement, healthcare, etc, pretty soon all America will be defending are the 1% and a bunch of rocks.
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03-24-2017 05:05
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