Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   i get called "insane" at least four times a day by both real and imaginary people.

   All successful people have had plans that failed, but none have ever failed to plan.

   People have to stop drinking from wells they didn't dig.

   I hate texting people who don't use smileys. I feel like I'm texting an emotionless robot!!!

   Kangaroos cant hop backwards.... it's not very funny, but you learned something! I don't care how drunk you get tonight, you will never forget that!

   Some people are like pennies. Two-Faced And Worthless.

   Computers are VERY educational devices... they teach people how to @#%$ cuss!

   Dora has taught me just enough Spanish to engage Spanish-speaking people in the worst conversation they've ever had

   Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin....

   At a rally tonight Donald Trump asked, "How stupid are the people of this country?" He should know since they're all at his rally.

   ever sat in the parking lot at walmart and honk at random people and watch their reaction? hahaha

   Dear Facebook, these people that you are suggestion her to friends with is making her sad. She thought you knew better than that.

   New Age is Old School: The Dream(Prince), Trey Songz(R.Kelly), and Lady GaGa(Madonna)...Get your own image people

   Literally just spent all night surrounded by the dumbest asses in captivity.....reason number 114 why people should beat their children. If you beat them while they're children, I wouldn't need to beat them as adults......they would learn to fear and resp

   I hate it when people call me sexist. Some of my closest friends belong in the kitchen.

   People who pimp out pick up trucks , is like dressing your little boy up in girls clothes.

   the sun does not rise, it stays still. it's the earth spinning that makes it seem like it moves silly people.

   Would it really hurt to use to FAWKING BLINKER PEOPLE!!!!!

   It took Trump two days - and outcry from lawmakers and many other people on social media -- to condemn white nationalists and neo-Nazis. I no longer want to support a president like that. I was a huge Trump supporter - not anymore...

   Well, like I said to my television the other day watching Brandon. How can these people be so stupid?