John Y Funny Status Messages
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I prefer my water to be frozen into cubes and completely surrounded by vodka and tonic...
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05-18-2016 13:38 by John Y
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If you hold up a Shell and listen, you should hear the clerk tell you that he doesn't want any trouble.
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01-19-2015 15:58 by John Y
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St. Patrick's Day Tip: Remember to switch your regular toilet paper roll out with a green roll tonight...You'll thank me tomorrow.
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03-17-2015 20:36 by John Y
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You can think before you speak if you want to. I prefer to be just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.
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01-19-2015 15:20 by John Y
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I drink a shot of whiskey a day as a toast to the great life I've lived. I finish the bottle for other reasons.
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07-02-2015 16:12 by John Y
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Facebook: Where others entertain you with their boredom.
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12-16-2015 15:49 by John Y
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Its national shave your... Well, tomorrow is valentine's day. Just an FYI.
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02-13-2017 15:17 by John Y
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Don't eat the green snow!!!
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03-17-2017 14:12 by John Y
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Nothing sums up the proud Mexican spirit on their Independence Day like drunk college girls in sombreros screaming for more Patron!
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05-05-2012 22:00 by John Y
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I was beginning to wonder if the winter's directly before a presidential election year were all warmer than usual due these lie spuing politicians and the amount of hot air hey were expelling.
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01-11-2016 16:40 by John Y
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Yes a few rounds being dumped into your back is above and beyond excessive force. And murder. But once again, it's very simple, if you comply, you don't die... Pants Up Don't Loot!!!
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04-08-2015 14:37 by John Y
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Take it easy this Black Friday, (try not to trample anyone to death) because it isn't supposed to look like a riot you idiots... Shop online like a real modern American!
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11-28-2014 15:39 by John Y
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I'm looking for any of you who may have a Selfie Stick. Please let me know if you have one, I'm asking so I know who to delete.
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01-11-2015 21:54 by John Y
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The FBI interviewed the Orlando Shooter 3 times. Just an FYI to you killary supporters that think she's so great.
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07-08-2016 15:27 by John Y
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Great news everyone...According to this pregnancy test I'm just fat!
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01-19-2015 15:34 by John Y
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I can think of absolutely no acceptable situation where a grown man should be taking a selfie, especially a bathroom mirror selfie... Seriously stop it, you're embarrassing yourself!
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08-07-2014 15:14 by John Y
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I'm thankful that everyone has finally shut up about this Ebola hysteria to let us all celebrate Thanksgiving.
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11-25-2014 21:14 by John Y
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How was the peaceful protest at Berkeley last night? Did they quitely sing kumbaya?
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02-02-2017 15:46 by John Y
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So let me get this straight...The new twenty dollar bill is going to feature Harriet Tubman using the men's room at a target?
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04-24-2016 10:40 by John Y
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Now that the 4th of July has come and gone, who's Right's, Belief's, or Heritage should we isht on this week?
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07-06-2015 14:22 by John Y
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