Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
«Previous
1
Page: 1 of 6303

   messageicon The receipts are out. How can Gaetz be this dumb?
←Rate | 04-12-2021 23:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am only commenting to let you understand of the really good encounter my friend's girl obtained browsing your web site. She mastered too many pieces, with the inclusion of how it is like to possess an excellent teaching mood to get other people just tho
←Rate | 04-12-2021 21:10 by kyrie7 Comments (0)  


   messageicon can whoever turned off the bermuda triangle please turn it back on again thanks
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just because you are vaccinated doesn’t mean you can now wear Axe Body Spray.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m starting to get to the age where I need a well thought out plan in order to stand up.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The check engine light came on inside my oven.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Youth Soccer: $75 to watch your kid pick dandelions.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bought way too much food when the pandemic began and now my tater tots are tater tweens.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was thinking about blocking the Suez canal but that ship has sailed
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Starting to think my job only wants me for my labor
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If any Disney execs are reading this, call me. I’ve got an idea for another Star Wars spin off. It’s called Paul Darth, Maul Cop.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon fully vaccinated and about to show the geese in this parking lot who’s boss
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What did I learn today? Never use a dentist with a huge inflatable molar on his roof.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your pee smells like burnt toast it’s time to get some new pee.
←Rate | 04-12-2021 11:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Filipinos: The Mexicans of the Asian Race
←Rate | 04-12-2021 10:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't let the past create the
←Rate | 04-11-2021 23:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why doesn't the news talk about the thousands of illegals this president is letting cross the border.?
←Rate | 04-11-2021 18:38 by M.M. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why does Matt Gaetz hate rush hour on the highway? Because he prefers minor traffic.
←Rate | 04-11-2021 10:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon WARNING: If you see a link that tells you to, "Click For Free Nickelback Tickets!", Do not click!! I repeat, DO NOT CLICK!!!! It directs you to a link that will actually give you free Nickelback tickets!!!!
←Rate | 04-11-2021 04:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I and also my buddies came looking through the excellent secrets and techniques found on your site while quickly I got an awful suspicion I never expressed respect to the blog owner for those strategies. Most of the young men became as a consequence warme
←Rate | 04-11-2021 03:13 by yeezyboost350v2 Comments (0)  



«Previous
1

Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left