Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Voted. Now, I watch and wait to see which loser wins.

   I wonder if the BOSS played "Born in the USA" yesterday just to get under Donald Trumps skin.

   I was gonna vote. But the I got high.

   I just made Romney noodles Obama self : - /

   My American friend says he's going to vote for the one who is willing to making the Pringles tubes biggers....as soon as he gets his hand out of one.

   If you're undecided...vote for the one that held the most babies...

   If you are undecided, vote for the one you would most likely buy a used car from.

   When I voted I wrote Abraham Lincoln in for president and Bill Clinton in for Vice President , Because 2 things this country has Too much of is vampires and ho'z !!

   It's finally here in a few hours America will finally find out the winner.............. between the pistons and the nuggets.

   Wear a smile. One size fits all

   When I was born, the day I was brought home form the hospital my parents put up a sign on my bedroom door: "Checkout Time 18 Years"

   Heading to the polls to vote for the fifth time this week!!!!...... God I love living in the state of Florida!!!!

   I'm predicting Obama will take an early lead tomorrow. Until all the Republicans get off work.

   In 2013 I'm going to sit back, watch the movie 2012 and laugh..

   Vick's career has always been dogged by bad decisions ..

   Help!!!!! I just took a bunch of these blue pills because some asian dude told me today was E-R-E-C-T-I-O-N day.

   Who is ready to celebrate "No More Campaing" Adds on Wednesday? Ive got the beer!

   I'd like to know what Obama or Romney propose to do about bathroom mirror profile pictures.

   Women... the more attention they get, the more options they seek.

   The male version of "Fifty Shades of Grey" arrives this Tuesday at Midnight. They are calling it "Halo 4" !!! Countless crowds are standing in line anywhere games are sold.