Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon This is getting boring. It's like beating up a butterfly with only one wing.
←Rate | 04-05-2025 22:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Weekend Update on SNL literally skinned M^G^ nutcases alive tonight. So good 😂
←Rate | 04-06-2025 01:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The 'world's', not the "worlds. I didn't include the possibility of other inhabited planets, although you and Koening would qualify. Back to remedial English class, you ignoramus.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 06:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ummm, "world's" not "world's. You forgot the second quotation mark. Nice attempt though.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 08:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In fact, let's take it a step further. You only used one individual quotation mark the first time you used the word. Then the second time, you started with a proper quotation mark, but then didn't complete it with the second one.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 08:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Single quotation marks are used to indicate a quotation within a quotation. That's not what you did. Jesus Christ you dumbf*cks make it easy for me.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 08:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Are you just mad because kids in Texas are now getting admitted to hospital in droves from Vitamin A poisoning thanks to that RFK quack? Oh come on. Where's your sense of humor? We think it's f*cking hilarious 🤣
←Rate | 04-06-2025 08:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If this were real life, you'd be beaten so bad, you'd starve to death doing backflips 🤡
←Rate | 04-06-2025 08:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe we need a 100% tariff on microphones to prevent idiots from doing podcasts.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 09:53 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Way to muss the point. Not bad for a Canuck Rusky Com... ee
←Rate | 04-06-2025 10:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Way to "muss" the point? You're on a roll aren't ya? Ret*rd 🤭
←Rate | 04-06-2025 10:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Here, I feel like I'm moving way too fast for you. Let me dumb it down. Hmmmmm. Ok let's try this one - Everything you say is so funny I forgot to laugh. There. Is that more your "level"? Let me guess. Illinois? 😂
←Rate | 04-06-2025 10:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just figured out who you are. You're not from Illinois. You're from Indiana! You're the fat M^G^ loser who pulled the gun at the protest yesterday! It's all over the news! Is that why you're so upset all the time? Because of your three stomachs?
←Rate | 04-06-2025 10:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yep. You got it!
←Rate | 04-06-2025 10:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lots of birthdays this week, and here's why. These pregnancies occured on or near the 4th of July. Apparently, fireworks were not only set off outdoors, they continued throughout the night in the bedroom.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 11:08 by NotGaryKoenig-or-Canuck Comments (0)  


   messageicon His numbers are plummeting. Fun to watch 🥳
←Rate | 04-06-2025 11:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Plummet this.
←Rate | 04-06-2025 16:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remain calm. at least we have a great leader now as opposed to sleepy
←Rate | 04-06-2025 16:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe he'll be able to regrow the economy like he did his ear after the "assa**ination" attempt LMAO
←Rate | 04-06-2025 19:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon He always bragged about his "large" crowds. Almost 5 million people turned out today across your sh*thole country. He finally has those great numbers he always wanted!!!!! I wonder how many of those people voted for him? HAHA
←Rate | 04-06-2025 19:29 Comments (0)  




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