Nunthewizr Funny Status Messages
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When someone posts a picture of their new car and you want to reply, "Congrats on your $600 a month payment!"
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I wonder if clouds look down on us and say stuff like "That one's shaped like an idiot."
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Realized I’ve never seen gloves in someone’s glove compartment, and now nothing makes sense anymore
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Before the internet I used to like people.
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Chinese food to go: $17.95. Gas to go get it $1.50. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of your containers: Riceless.
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Swimming in the pool counts as a shower, right?!?
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When I die, donate my teeth to the Walmart Cashiers.
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You can workout and brag about your muscles all you want but it still isn't going to make you any taller.
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I don't get why any woman stays single. You would think they would get married so they can let themselves go.
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If the Universe could talk, it would sound like a combination of Morgan Freeman and Optimus Prime.
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