KIsstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Life caught me caring and punished me accordingly.
←Rate | 08-28-2013 13:02 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon She told me she was a vegan so I pretended I never met herbivore.
←Rate | 05-22-2013 09:13 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm black but not "ain't nobody got time for that" black.
←Rate | 05-19-2013 11:00 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Saw a girl at Starbucks with a duck face. Felt bad because I left my bread crumbs at home.
←Rate | 05-19-2013 10:35 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon In my car, I control the music. If this is a problem for you, just remember this... your life is in my hands. I am the one who is driving. I can kill us.
←Rate | 05-19-2013 10:30 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don’t tell your girlfriend she’s beautiful everyday, 614 guys on Facebook who haven’t had sex or even been on a date in 9 years will.
←Rate | 05-15-2013 15:02 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies, if what you did to him cannot be fixed with a blow job then I suggest you better start looking for a new boyfriend.
←Rate | 05-15-2013 14:58 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Marriage is like prison except the food is better and your cellmate never changes.
←Rate | 05-15-2013 11:40 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever just apologize for no reason whatsoever? No? It must be nice being single.
←Rate | 05-13-2013 09:16 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like reserving tables at restaurants using unique names so I can hear the hostess announce, "Optimus Prime? Your table for 2 is ready!"
←Rate | 05-12-2013 07:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  



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