Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Did our government only admit to UFO's because we're going to start sending their planets money for aid?
←Rate | 04-19-2024 10:44 by @ttmichael09 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you see me talking to myself, don't judge us. We're trying to talk ourselves out of doing something stupid.
←Rate | 04-19-2024 05:54 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon Did my taxes and discovered I still owe Ukraine $4000.
←Rate | 04-18-2024 12:54 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I am positive that there isn't life on any other planets ! If there was Trudeau would have sent them money
←Rate | 04-17-2024 18:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I always thought it was "Blew by you"
←Rate | 04-17-2024 16:35 by MWC Comments (0)  

   messageicon I ate a kid's meal at McDonald's today. His parents weren't too happy about it.
←Rate | 04-17-2024 08:31 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon I’m getting stronger with age. I can now lift $100 worth of groceries with one hand.
←Rate | 04-15-2024 15:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If Joe Biden's economy is so good, why can't those student loans people pay back their own loans?
←Rate | 04-15-2024 13:19 Comments (0)  

   messageicon When you die people cry and beg for you to come back. But when you do, there's the running and the screaming.
←Rate | 04-15-2024 08:49 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon I saw all your OJ jokes yesterday and they absolutely killed me
←Rate | 04-13-2024 08:21 Comments (0)  


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