paulb808 Funny Status Messages

   U love someone and you marry someone else. The one you marry becomes ur wife and the one you love becomes the password of your email

   I miss high school...only there could you hear at ten in the morning...Bro afta shave on my balls was the worst idea ever

   I love getting all these "you are soo funny"!" You make me laugh so much!!" Yeah well I can make you moan also status king blah

   Dear Ghetto Mom...no one is going to hire your chils named Shaniquillla

   no woman will ever be truely satisfied because no man will ever have a chocolate penis that ejaculates money…

   i am so tired of not being able to swear in my statuses since my family got facebook. So f&ck it. Sorry grandma.

   You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

   When gays hack into their gay mate's facebook accounts, do they change the status to, “I'M STRAIGHT AND I LOVE EATING PU$$Y!”?

   Aw sh!t…im the only black person in my african studies class. This could be awkward…

   I am Nigerian Prince. If you click “like” I send you 17 Billion Dollars. I am very genuinelyness

   My girlfriend has a weird fetish, she likes to dress up like herself and act like a b!tch every night.

   I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot

   How come a “drunk” girl on my facebook is able to enter her username and password correctly but when it comes to writing a status she types “90]]]]]]]]]POSPASFD@#”

   wonders if it's ironic that I have facebook open in another tab.....you do to dont you

   Just saw a girl in a plain push wheelchair holding on to her guy's motorized wheelchair and rolling behind him. Dude, she's using you.

   getting to the point where he has to choose between Facebook and having a degree

   I accidentally said “LOL” today. I think I deserve to be shot.

   My Craigslist hooker turned out to be a man. It has been over an hour and he won't take a hint to leave. He can keep my 200 bucks. This was a poor idea.

   facebook – Never letting you forget any of the douchebags you've fuct

   Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?