Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

Thinks Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. What do you know about Chuck?

Submitted: 11-04-2010 12:59 by @gnarleycharley Comments (0)

There was never a giraffe until Chuck Norris upper-cutted a zebra

Submitted: 12-30-2009 17:23 by bob@bob.com Comments (0)

This status has been removed by Chuck Norris

Submitted: 11-12-2009 21:37 by @CGRIN2049 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:05 Comments (0)

"if at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris"

Submitted: 02-12-2011 12:42 Comments (0)

Just tired too Google Chuck Norris real name...And Google told me too stop looking for trouble...

Submitted: 07-17-2011 08:31 by bryan j brown Comments (0)

"If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch."

Submitted: 07-13-2011 14:51 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)

Jesus may have been able to walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Submitted: 08-18-2012 04:16 by The Chuckinator Comments (0)

Chuck Norris likes his meat so rare that he only eats unicorns.

Submitted: 07-25-2012 02:31 by 1568 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris has been to Mars, that is why there is no life there

Submitted: 06-17-2012 16:03 Comments (0)

When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up

Submitted: 06-14-2012 11:28 Comments (0)

When Chuck Norris adds milk to Rice Krispies, there's no Snap Crackle & Pop. They shut the fuck up.

Submitted: 05-21-2012 15:15 by BEGO Comments (0)

Boooooomm! The sound of Chuck Norris Makeing Love

Submitted: 05-02-2012 15:01 by Little T Comments (0)

In space Chuck Norris can hear you scream

Submitted: 04-05-2011 17:48 Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:25 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris' Birthday is December 22nd... Good luck with that Mayans..

Submitted: 05-02-2012 13:17 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris doesn't worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:14 Comments (0)

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the f*ck down.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:12 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:59 Comments (0)

Harry Potter needs 8 movies to seek and destroy Voldemort. Chuck Norris needs 4 seconds.

Submitted: 03-20-2011 04:02 by hovo Comments (0)