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Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake........ After three days of pain and agony ..................the rattle snake died
"when Graham Bell invented the phone, he found two messages from Chuck Norris"
"You don't need to follow Chuck Norris on Twitter, he is already following you."
"Chuck Norris's sister lost her virginity, Chuck found it an put it back.."
Charlie Sheen is only winning because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. Now they are just called The Islands.
I'm about to go footloose on yo ass with a little Chuck Norris behind those kicks
Expendables 2 starring Chuck Norris and his B*tches
"If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris."
"Chuck Norris once did steroids, and the pills got stronger."
KID: "I got 87% on the test & you?" ME: "125%" KID: "How? There was no extra credit!?" ME: "I just put Chuck Norris for every answer."
Today is Chuck Norris's birthday. His birthday cake is topped with sticks of dynamite instead of candles.
ERA is Chuck Norris approved...it shows stain no mercy
We need Chuck Norris to control Gasoline Prices .. Kick that booteh dude !!
The best part of waking up IS NOT Folgers in your cup. It is knowing that Chuck Norris did not kill you in your sleep.
"I don't play rock, paper, scissors, I play rock, paper, Chuck Norris, I win every time"
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook you die!