Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

"Happy Birthday Chuck Norris! When Chuck Norris was born, he delivered himself before delivering a roundhouse kick to the doctor."

Submitted: 03-10-2011 22:00 by JQ Comments (0)

@ChuckDamnNorris: Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

Submitted: 12-12-2012 23:14 by Surge Comments (0)

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take sh&t from anybody.

Submitted: 12-12-2012 08:18 Comments (0)

Got milk? ..Chuck Norris does

Submitted: 06-30-2011 02:31 by gee Comments (0)

Leading hand sanitizers claim to kill %99.99 of germs. Chuck Norris can kill %100 of whatever the *blip* he wants.

Submitted: 11-18-2012 12:37 by PewPew Comments (0)

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:17 Comments (0)

Says Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

Submitted: 09-12-2009 17:22 by Molly Comments (0)

When Chuck Norris holds the iPhone 4 the signal increases

Submitted: 08-10-2010 02:10 Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris does not wear condoms, because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris"

Submitted: 02-22-2011 02:00 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris does not exist. If he existed right now he would be smashing my head on the keyboarj.dbkjls dfaòbslbfaslfbafsdlcvxnmvmalòsdfldjkf sdfhljas

Submitted: 06-21-2013 02:40 by Alexandre Comments (0)

Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 04-12-2011 19:53 Comments (0)

Saw Chuck Norris gargle peanut butter.

Submitted: 03-03-2011 20:31 Comments (0)

Ever time you jack off Chuck Norris punches a mexican baby in the face with the third fist under his beard

Submitted: 05-02-2012 14:45 by biggy dickson Comments (0)

Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:57 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

Submitted: 08-10-2013 10:09 by snotty Comments (0)

When god sneezes Chuck Norris blesses him!

Submitted: 07-22-2013 22:47 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris' sperm count is so high that b!tches have to chew before they can swallow his load

Submitted: 12-13-2011 14:02 Comments (0)

God may walk on water but Chuck Norris cn swim on land

Submitted: 06-05-2012 01:38 by Fai\'tjie Comments (0)

Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he's sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:14 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris knows who let the dogs out.

Submitted: 04-05-2011 17:51 Comments (0)