jc Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Playboy doesn't show nudes. MTV doesn't play music videos. The Learning Channel makes you dumber. What happened to the world
←Rate | 10-13-2015 08:59 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think Facebook needs another relationship type: Domestic Incarceration
←Rate | 01-27-2011 02:53 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Playboy is dropping nudes because they're too easy to find on the internet? I had no idea. I only read the internet for the articles.
←Rate | 10-13-2015 08:57 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I blocked you on Facebook, what makes you think I want to talk to you in real life?
←Rate | 04-28-2011 09:47 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm convinced this formula is correct: big car stereo = small wiener
←Rate | 12-21-2010 17:29 by JC Comments (2)  


   messageicon The older I get, the older old is.
←Rate | 02-05-2011 18:00 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you remember Sit and Spin? No, not the toy... your early drinking days.
←Rate | 05-06-2011 14:32 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can't get on your feet until you get off your ass.
←Rate | 09-21-2010 09:34 by JC Comments (1)  


   messageicon When I say, "I never do that"...what I mean is "I haven't done that in the past five minutes."
←Rate | 04-05-2011 12:04 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your proctologist called. He found your head.
←Rate | 09-20-2010 10:17 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am addicted to Cold Turkey. Not sure how I will ever quit that one.
←Rate | 11-30-2010 09:51 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't make me go all CAPS LOCKS on you...
←Rate | 04-22-2011 11:43 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon As a fast driver, I have certain rules when I come to a red light intersection with two or more lanes. In order of importance: Never get behind a: 1) A semi, bus or large truck, 2) Drivers with grey hair, 3) A Prius (or other hybrid), and 4) A mini van
←Rate | 03-13-2011 13:41 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dad always tried to warn me that if I continued to play with the stapler while naked I would eventually be bored enough to try stapling things that should not be stapled. For well over 30 years I proved Dad wrong. Today, however, he was finally right.
←Rate | 09-17-2010 16:39 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon The month of March - In like a lion, out like a lamb. A ferocious, saber-toothed, axe-wielding, lamb. Brrrrr...
←Rate | 03-30-2011 08:06 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm hung like Einstein and smart as a horse.
←Rate | 09-20-2010 11:40 by JC Comments (6)  


   messageicon Growing old but never up
←Rate | 09-29-2008 23:00 by Jc Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Pope excommunicates Italian Mafia: I wonder who the next pope is gonna be...
←Rate | 06-23-2014 10:21 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I read today that 99% of women don't like men in leather pants. That is convenient...because 99% of men in leather pants don't like women.
←Rate | 04-25-2013 13:14 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I use my cell phone as backlighting at night when I flip someone off so they can better see my finger.
←Rate | 05-30-2011 11:51 by JC Comments (0)  




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