Baddie Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon You don't know this but right after you leave the restaurant with your crying baby the rest of us applaud.
←Rate | 05-14-2012 15:11 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon A threesome? Nah not for me. If I wanted to horribly disappoint two other people I'd go out to dinner with my parents.
←Rate | 07-27-2013 13:33 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm sick of closing out every job interview with "I was young. I needed the money."
←Rate | 09-05-2013 12:25 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just gave my girlfriend my two week notice.
←Rate | 07-18-2012 14:00 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being white has its disadvantages too, you know. It can be super hard to find a rap song on iTunes when you spell all the words correctly.
←Rate | 07-16-2013 12:36 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Please don't come to my garage sale if you've ever let me borrow something.
←Rate | 08-10-2014 13:00 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not mature enough to be in a yoga class.
←Rate | 06-25-2014 00:57 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you cry loudly enough at a Walmart everyone will just assume you work there.
←Rate | 11-21-2014 00:37 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you wear a tie with a short sleeve shirt you can walk into any RadioShack and start working.
←Rate | 03-21-2014 13:46 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Say what you want about Canada but they successfully got rid of Justin Bieber.
←Rate | 05-24-2014 12:12 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh is it really raining outside? Please post a status update for all of us with no windows.
←Rate | 04-01-2012 10:00 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just counted 37 things at my work that I could kill my boss with.
←Rate | 06-01-2013 12:41 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon All cursive neck tattoos should just say ‘child support.
←Rate | 01-13-2014 13:47 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your outfit says you work in an office, but your shoes say it might have a pole in it
←Rate | 07-28-2014 14:07 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when I order a pizza online & it asks "Do you accept the terms and conditions?" I'm ordering a pizza, not launching a nuclear weapon.
←Rate | 08-16-2013 13:50 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon You had me at "there's no security cameras."
←Rate | 05-10-2014 14:26 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon So this whole working for a living sh*t goes on for how long?
←Rate | 10-29-2014 12:57 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon All this restraining order means is that I love you too much.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 09:34 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe I should get married. Its not like I have sex anyway.
←Rate | 10-30-2012 15:41 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife and I have the cutest nicknames for each other. She is my buttercup and i'm her useless sack of s hit.
←Rate | 10-05-2012 14:21 by Baddie Comments (0)  




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