John Y Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I guess Monica Lewinsky is trying to sell herself as some sort of crusader against cyber bullying. I'm glad she found a new calling, she blew her chances at a political career!
←Rate | 10-27-2014 22:10 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon No its not "cute", its actually quite slutty looking, and yes I love it!
←Rate | 10-31-2014 17:11 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to the “you snooze you lose” principle, insomnia should have me surpassing that doped up whack job Charlie Scheen in the winning department!
←Rate | 11-08-2014 02:46 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm thankful that everyone has finally shut up about this Ebola hysteria to let us all celebrate Thanksgiving.
←Rate | 11-25-2014 21:14 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon Take it easy this Black Friday, (try not to trample anyone to death) because it isn't supposed to look like a riot you idiots... Shop online like a real modern American!
←Rate | 11-28-2014 15:39 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm allergic to gluten free diets.
←Rate | 12-23-2014 15:46 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I made up a new drinking/card game. Its very simple to play, you simply draw a card and if its black you take a shot. Oh yeah, I call it Ferguson.
←Rate | 12-23-2014 15:47 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon What you call vocabulary, others may call jargon, gibberish, lingo or slang...but its all the same to me.
←Rate | 12-29-2014 15:16 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm looking for any of you who may have a Selfie Stick. Please let me know if you have one, I'm asking so I know who to delete.
←Rate | 01-11-2015 21:54 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon My medical ID bracelet says "Probably Drunk".
←Rate | 01-16-2015 14:47 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember simpler times, when George Michael was straight, Prince was gay, and Catholic Priests could be trusted with young boys.
←Rate | 01-17-2015 17:19 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon Call me a critic but I would just about guarantee that the idiot selling seashells down by the seashore is a product of the No Child Left Behind Act.
←Rate | 01-18-2015 14:44 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I just look at a person and think seriously,that's the sperm that won the race.
←Rate | 01-19-2015 14:35 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon The money I'm saving by not having a girlfriend on valentines day will most likely be spent on booze to help me through these trying and lonely times.
←Rate | 01-19-2015 14:37 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon When one door closes you open it back up...That's how doors work.
←Rate | 01-19-2015 14:42 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wouldn't it be ironic if you found out you were conceived on a pull out couch?
←Rate | 01-19-2015 15:02 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you fill a Whoopee cushion with gravy it adds a great new twist to a rather boring practical joke...
←Rate | 01-19-2015 15:05 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who have never had a suicidal thought have probably never touched a wet public bathroom door knob.
←Rate | 01-19-2015 15:18 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can think before you speak if you want to. I prefer to be just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.
←Rate | 01-19-2015 15:20 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon You people can keep blaming your weight/waist or tight fitting clothes on the holidays if you want, but I am not going to lie to myself or others. I was fat in August!
←Rate | 01-19-2015 15:27 by John Y Comments (0)  




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