Griff Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon When I was a kid, there was no Internet. Sometimes people would walk for miles to call me a bastard.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 22:36 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I was a kid I slept with a nightlight... to keep away monsters who were scared of small, low wattage light bulbs.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:59 by Griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Warning: forgetting what pocket your keys are in may result in the Macarena.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:57 by Griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to the customer service, the cable guy should be here sometime between 10:00 a.m. and the return of Christ.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:57 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon A comprehensive list of the things women have taught me: 1) I'm wrong.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:56 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you have ever sat in the toilet at work and wondered how long you can sit there before someone searches for you, the answer is 47 minutes
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:55 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon You offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:54 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing says you are ugly like Facebook asking ''Are you sure you want to make this your profile picture?''
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:52 by griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your wife says "what would you do without me?" "Live happily ever after" is NOT the correct answer.
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:51 by Griff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’ve had no formal martial arts training, but I know for a fact the Power Rangers are wasting too much energy on unnecessary summersaults
←Rate | 10-19-2013 09:47 by griff Comments (0)  



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