Keith Albert Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I will never go Bungee Jumping. Put all your faith in a piece of Rubber? I got here because of its failure and I don't plan on giving it a chance to take me out!
←Rate | 03-19-2011 13:11 by Keith Albert Comments (0)  


   messageicon The word "Excellent" has many meanings. For example, if a man were to shoot his Grandmother at a range of five hundred yards, I would call him an "excellent" shot, but I don't think that's what Bill and Ted meant by "Be Excellent to each other!"
←Rate | 04-13-2011 16:14 by Keith Albert Comments (1)  


   messageicon Why is 4/21 National Employer Random Drug Testing Day?
←Rate | 04-20-2011 16:24 by Keith Albert Comments (1)  


   messageicon Amy Winehouse joins the Forever 27 Club. When does Lady Gaga turn 27?
←Rate | 07-24-2011 07:32 by Keith Albert Comments (0)  


   messageicon I yawn and you assume I quit listening. Truth be told, I was never listening.
←Rate | 08-15-2011 15:18 by Keith Albert Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know the exact day I gave up following the path of least resistance. It's on my birth certificate.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 11:30 by Keith Albert Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the first thing you see after you die is a handbasket, check your undershorts for kerosene.
←Rate | 07-10-2013 00:32 by Keith Albert Comments (0)  



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