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04-02-2010 13:49 by lemonpillow
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While getting dressed this morning, I decided I have been spending waaaaay too much time on the computer, when I caught myself checking the lower right corner of my make-up mirror to see what time it was.
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07-07-2010 14:14 by lemonpillow
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Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
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02-02-2011 13:50 by lemonpillow
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I met a girl in a pub last night.We ended up going back to hers.After a few more drinks, we started kissing & having a bit of foreplay on the sofa.She looked at me and said, "Let's take this upstairs."I said,"Okay you grab one end and I'll grab the other.
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07-03-2010 08:25 by lemonpillow
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When I die, I want to be buried with a ring of toasters surrounding me. That way, when Archaeologists dig me up in 1,000 years they'll say "Ohh she must have been important!"