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Eddy Funny Status Messages
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Page: 6 of 16
friends are like boobs...some are real, some are fake...sometimes its hard to tell the real ones from the fake ones
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19
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12-22-2010 01:00 by
Eddy
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the boss keeps talking about a company 401 k ..... I don't think I can run that far
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9
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03-30-2015 22:36 by
Eddy
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if Steve jobs invented the MAC computer, does that make him the original "Mac Daddy"?
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11-15-2012 00:26 by
Eddy
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in England, "pounds" are money....im not fat, I'm rich
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09-25-2013 21:35 by
Eddy
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a friend's kid accidentally stuck their cat in the dryer. my friend was all sad about it so I sung the sad song....soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur.....the song didn't help at all
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9
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03-09-2014 23:45 by
Eddy
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the song "100 bottles of beer on the wall"...most not be much alcohol in them if you can keep track of 100 beers you've drank
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6
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07-02-2012 23:37 by
Eddy
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if i'm not funny, amusing, or entertaining in any way there is no refund
10
5
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12-28-2012 16:58 by
Eddy
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i keep getting all these popups...if this lasts 4 hours, I'm gonna have to visit WebMD
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02-23-2013 02:22 by
Eddy
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an earthquake on valentines night....somewhere someone thinks they were great in bed to their lover for a perfect ending on the holiday
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02-14-2014 23:24 by
Eddy
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the dentist says I need a crown. I'm like "I know, right? "
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11-09-2018 04:27 by
Eddy
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forget senior discounts..Oj can get free stuff just buy saying something like "I'd kill to have some coffee right now"
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4
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07-25-2017 21:27 by
Eddy
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this new "space force" we're going to have....will basic training include making the kessel run in less than 12 parsecs
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06-20-2018 03:55 by
Eddy
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pro tip....today invest in buying Energizer & Duracell stocks
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3
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02-14-2017 00:27 by
Eddy
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when idiots do the "Tide pod challenge" & a friend records it, are they POD casting?
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01-24-2018 00:52 by
Eddy
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where's the CTRL, ALT and DELETE buttons on life?
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04-14-2016 01:54 by
Eddy
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every toddler is just a mini version of Jack Skellington... "what's this, what's this"
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08-05-2019 13:25 by
Eddy
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people worry about their "summer body" but I've been working on my "winter weight" for years
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09-04-2019 07:31 by
Eddy
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idk who "go round" is but all the kids on the playground want to marry her
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12-03-2019 21:21 by
Eddy
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When I see all these zoom video chat conferences, I think of the opening scene of "The Brady Bunch"
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04-15-2020 15:47 by
Eddy
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I see house flies in the house...horse flies near horses...so why do I never see dragon flies on episodes of Game of Thrones?
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02-18-2018 19:56 by
Eddy
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