Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Its pretty sad I have to put parental controls on Google just to get pumpkin ideas.. Do not Google anything ending with "on a broom".
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:14 by ANGELA Comments (0)  


   messageicon He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pride, commitment, teamwork - words we use to get you to work for free.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:10 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:09 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon BEFORE MARRIAGE: Saturday Night Fever AFTER: Monday Night Football
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:08 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 16:07 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't ever wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 15:58 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is a comedy for those who think... and a tragedy for those who feel.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 15:57 by Hannibal Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to a fancy dress party in just his underwear tonight... and when people ask "what you come as" i'll say " A Premature Ejaculation, I've just come in my pants"
←Rate | 10-30-2010 14:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow !!!!!! this is the oldest i've ever been, I fell Great..... Just out ran the kid next door to the ice cream truck, so what if he's only 10, i've still got something left in the old tank... It's a good day, a really good day!!!!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 13:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants to remind everyone that all those little ghosts, goblins, princesses, and witches are having the time of their life so please drink responsibly and drive safetly.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 13:40 by fefe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Perfect nite for New Years eve practice....You can build up your alcohol tolerance in disguise to hide the fact your a lightweight.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 13:12 by nyrock Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a toyota prius crashes into a tree, does it make a sound?
←Rate | 10-30-2010 13:11 by Supraman Comments (0)  


   messageicon trying to find the differences between an Oompa-Loompa and Snooki... gotta be the hair!!!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 12:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy Halloweenkend!!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 12:19 by L Comments (0)  


   messageicon ...this year in California, the most popular Halloween mask is Arnold Schwartzenegger. The great thing about it is: with a mouthful of candy, you'll sound just like him!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 12:08 by mickeybruce Comments (0)  


   messageicon i find myself trying to like text messages..wtf?
←Rate | 10-30-2010 12:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thats the last time I order cheap printer cartridges from yemen.......
←Rate | 10-30-2010 11:35 by chronic Comments (0)  


   messageicon The devil and I go way back. It all started that day we were playing with matches!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 11:27 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon starting an oatmeal delivery company.I`m leaning towards naming it Haulin` Oats.
←Rate | 10-30-2010 11:25 Comments (0)  



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