Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Women are like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get...so you should sample them all...maybe eat a few too...
←Rate | 02-10-2011 15:11 by M.A.C. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Final Words..."These are the GOOD kind of mushrooms"
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're getting old when you need a sports bra on to brush your teeth.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good friends will be there with tissues...Best friends will be there with a baseball bat saying " what did they do to you and do I need a shovel?''
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh. so we have to be all cryptic and call them "magic" brownies but we can come right out and say pot pie?
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't exercise. If God wanted me to bend over, he'd have put diamonds on the floor.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon not laughing at you--I'm laughing near you. And pointing. At you.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have come to the conclusion that my adult life was contrived by a stoned teenager.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're happy and you know it, share your meds
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow! I just had a multiple sarcasm...
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There will never be true equality until men have to wear jockey shorts with under-wires that lift and separate.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men would cuddle more often if women smelled like bacon
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I ever get a firm grip on reality I'm gonna choke the sh*t out of it!
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So you're telling me that a house fell on your sister, and the only thing you care about is her shoes?
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i know its hump day but get off my leg.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon comforting the disturbed and disturbing the comfortable
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say weed kills brain cells. I'm down to my last two. One is on life support and the other one is trying to pull the plug.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ignorance is not bliss. It's just a fancy word for stupid.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where is this "chill pill" they talk about and how do I get like 5?
←Rate | 02-10-2011 14:15 Comments (0)  



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