Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon They say I have a preoccupation with revenge. We’ll just see about that.
←Rate | 05-22-2022 03:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Disney’s favorability collapses from 77% to 33% in one year. Boom!
←Rate | 05-22-2022 03:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home, they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.
←Rate | 05-24-2022 05:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you’re on your third “damn, that’s crazy” and they keep talking.
←Rate | 05-28-2022 01:36 by Jean Comments (0)  


   messageicon The CDC now recommends wearing your mask as a blindfold while pumping gas.
←Rate | 06-14-2022 03:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In France you don’t say “I miss you.” You say, “Tu me manques,” which means “you are missing from me.” I love that.
←Rate | 04-19-2022 10:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The bird flu? I hope so.
←Rate | 04-19-2022 11:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When she’s using her man’s phone to check the weather and wind blows her into his inbox.
←Rate | 07-04-2022 02:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon As I watch this generation try to rewrite history, one thing I’m sure of, it will be misspelled and without punctuation.
←Rate | 07-23-2022 00:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nurse: You may not feel anything from the waist down. Him: Just tits then?
←Rate | 05-08-2022 20:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone living in their grandmother’s basement used to be the butt of the joke. The rental market is so insane that now it’s like, dam, you’ve got a whole basement to yourself, that’s sexy.
←Rate | 05-11-2022 00:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m not here to fit into your world, I’m here to build my own world.
←Rate | 05-14-2022 03:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Coffee: More than four cups and you can talk to electricity.
←Rate | 05-15-2022 02:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
←Rate | 05-18-2022 00:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never forget where you came from, because that’s probably where you left your phone.
←Rate | 05-19-2022 07:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I never forget a face; but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.
←Rate | 07-23-2022 23:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If she starts drawing shapes on your chest after sex, just get up and leave. A very stupid question is coming.
←Rate | 07-03-2022 06:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of hearer as well as those of the speaker.
←Rate | 07-03-2022 06:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only time he messing with you is at night? Bi!ch, you’re dating a bedbug.
←Rate | 05-08-2022 20:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Might get crazy tonight and go to bed at 10 instead of 9.
←Rate | 05-19-2022 07:33 Comments (0)  



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