trickz100 Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Education is important, but opening the pubs is importanter.
←Rate | 05-13-2020 13:00 by Trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm pretty sure the hotel receptionist was checking me out!
←Rate | 01-19-2019 16:01 by Trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some guy knocked on my door earlier today and said, "I have a parcel for your next door neighbour." I replied, "You've got the wrong house then mate."
←Rate | 01-29-2018 12:46 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "You the bomb" "No, you the bomb" - A compliment in America. An argument in the middle east.
←Rate | 12-29-2017 01:49 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I took my ex out last night, it only took one punch! :)
←Rate | 01-28-2017 14:02 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it whenever I open a can of evaporated milk, it's still there?
←Rate | 05-25-2013 03:34 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I booked a nice table for two, then she tells me she doesn't like snooker, wtf?
←Rate | 02-14-2013 04:23 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to my Nike Fuelband, I've just masturbated for 4 miles.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 11:47 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 12.12.12 - It's a good day to test a microphone :)
←Rate | 12-12-2012 02:29 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lazy Fact #12983789127489: You were too lazy to read that number .
←Rate | 06-09-2012 00:53 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I tried to share a kebab with a homeless guy I saw sitting on a bench last night. He told me to f*ck off and buy my own.
←Rate | 04-11-2012 21:41 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today, A 12 year-old came up to me and said "May I please have a cigarette?". I can't believe kids this age are already so polite.
←Rate | 03-11-2012 16:02 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rupert Murdoch is said to be deeply touched by the messages from family and friends left on Whitney Houstons phone.
←Rate | 02-13-2012 02:41 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just killed a spider with my shoe. I don't care how big spiders are but no one steals my f*cking shoes!
←Rate | 11-23-2011 04:43 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just bought the wife a solar powered vibrator, seeing as the sun shines out of her arse it should save me a fortune on batteries.
←Rate | 09-16-2011 07:19 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Amy Winehouse Making the recession worse for drug dealers since 2011
←Rate | 07-23-2011 13:47 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just a kind thought to all those born on February 29th: You've only got 1 year left to plan your birthday party :D
←Rate | 02-28-2011 20:54 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A council estate in Liverpool was recently closed due to the discovery of an unidentified object. After 8 hours of scientific testing it turned out to be a payslip.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 03:16 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was asked to contribute money to help solve the civil unrest in Egypt, but I suspect it's some sort of pyramid scheme.
←Rate | 02-06-2011 06:26 by trickz100 Comments (1)  


   messageicon "Don't worry, there's plenty more fish in the sea!" - Err, who the hell would want to date a fish? O.o
←Rate | 02-06-2011 05:20 by trickz100 Comments (0)  


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