GlimmerTriplet Funny Status Messages

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'GlimmerTriplet': View All Messages
Page: 1 of 1

   messageicon Got some good financial news today. The kid I've been sponsoring in some third-world country got eaten by a lion.
←Rate | 09-27-2017 17:35 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon The last time Houston was under this much water her first name was Whitney.
←Rate | 08-30-2017 07:31 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I could have sex with anyone, living or dead, I would for sure pick living.
←Rate | 07-29-2017 10:10 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't celebrate Cinco de Mayo. - said no Juan ever.
←Rate | 05-06-2017 06:54 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got in touch with my feminine side this morning. I made myself breakfast.
←Rate | 04-24-2017 06:40 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon I sure am glad Hillary didn't get elected because we'd still have Obamacare and be at war with Syria.
←Rate | 04-08-2017 05:13 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon My daughter asked me why I carry a gun inside the house. I told her I was scared of the CIA. She laughed. I laughed. Amazon Echo laughed.
←Rate | 03-09-2017 04:35 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (1)  


   messageicon Generic Frosted Flakes are Oooooooookay!
←Rate | 01-30-2017 05:24 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon Slightly used Christmas tree only one month old. Paid $60. Looking for $40. No low ballers. Serious inquiries only.
←Rate | 01-03-2017 05:54 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would rather sit in front of Pee Wee Herman at a movie theater while out on a date with OJ Simpson after having drinks at Bill Cosby's bar where they use Flint, MI ice cubes after taking an elevator ride with Ray Rice all while Casey Anthony babysits.
←Rate | 11-06-2016 05:30 by GlimmerTriplet Comments (0)  


«Previous
1

[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left