One Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Health experts recommend 3 to 4 servings of fruit a day. So I wanna know exactly how many Coronas with limes is that gonna take?
←Rate | 10-28-2010 18:17 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Morning cardio routine: Stretch. Gravity Hand Slam on snooze button. Pull arm back under covers. Roll over. Wait 9 Minutes. Repeat
←Rate | 11-23-2010 12:07 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know about you but putting the Kardashian's on a credit card to promote financial responsability makes as much sense as getting a nun to be a spokes woman for a condom company.
←Rate | 11-11-2010 21:29 by One Comments (2)  


   messageicon If a cop stops me and says "papers" and I say "scissors" do I win?
←Rate | 05-14-2010 10:44 by one Comments (1)  


   messageicon if it is not on wikipedia, then you are wrong, lady
←Rate | 05-13-2010 20:28 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon at work, online researching how to be more productive at work
←Rate | 04-22-2010 11:25 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Turning his beds into bunk beds so that there is more room for activities
←Rate | 04-28-2010 11:52 by one Comments (1)  


   messageicon Yes, I saw you dance. No, I don't have a dollar
←Rate | 05-26-2010 22:53 by One Comments (0)  


   messageicon Blaming a Happy Meal your kid is too fat, is like suing a gym for losing weight.
←Rate | 04-28-2010 20:31 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon And the Lord said unto John, "Come fourth and receive eternal life..." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
←Rate | 12-24-2010 03:52 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon figured out that plastic surgery allows women to make their outer appearance resemble their inner appearance -- fake.
←Rate | 01-21-2011 21:53 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Get off the phone while you driving and while your at it, pick a lane and stick to it
←Rate | 05-19-2010 19:29 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon you know why guns are better the woman? You can put a silencer on a gun
←Rate | 09-17-2010 23:24 by one Comments (2)  


   messageicon Honk, if you want to see my finger!
←Rate | 12-02-2010 07:54 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do you bake cookies and cook bacon
←Rate | 05-04-2010 23:17 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do married people live longer than single ones, or does it only seem longer?
←Rate | 01-26-2011 21:47 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's better to have a gun and not need it than to not have a gun and need it
←Rate | 06-24-2010 19:54 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon i guess Farmville is cool, if your into doing thing with the animals
←Rate | 06-03-2010 19:52 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon two nuns are riding their bikes down a small stone trail, one nun tells the other "wow, I've never came this way before", "yeah I know, it must be these stones
←Rate | 05-03-2010 19:23 by one Comments (0)  


   messageicon Trying is the first step toward failure.
←Rate | 05-20-2010 03:13 by one Comments (3)  




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