Master Weeg Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I didn't say you were ugly. I said your girlfriend is better looking then you, and standing next to her you look ugly.
←Rate | 10-31-2010 11:41 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guy in office: "My computer just went down on me!" Lady in next office: "Which button did you press to get that???"
←Rate | 04-12-2011 16:15 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon I met with my new girlfriends father for the first time yesterday. The first thing I said to him was, "Sir, you and me have something in common.." "What's that son?" I replied "Your daughter calls us both Daddy"
←Rate | 04-14-2011 15:37 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anyone who says onions are the only vegetable that can make you cry has never been hit in the face with a pumpkin.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 07:14 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon You don't have to be good to succeed. You just gotta be the least Crappy option. Example: We're eating at The Olive Garden.
←Rate | 10-31-2010 11:28 by Master Weeg Comments (1)  


   messageicon It's funny how people that seems to know everything are always the unhappiest.
←Rate | 10-10-2010 19:26 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon What to tell a girl before a one night stand - "If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.."
←Rate | 02-22-2011 07:24 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
←Rate | 12-15-2010 14:45 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I'm using Facebook mobile I always tag myself in my bed with 2 randcom chicks on my friends list.
←Rate | 04-14-2011 15:51 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Children are often spoiled because no one will spank Grandma.
←Rate | 08-10-2013 15:04 by Master weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish some people could just look at there own true colors of there character and see what an ugly picture they are painting with it.
←Rate | 05-27-2011 23:21 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon When something bad happens you have 3 choices, You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 13:28 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're gonna run into jerk offs. But remember, it's not the size of the a**hole you worry about, it's how much crap comes out of it.
←Rate | 10-31-2010 11:33 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend is currently trying to understand my desire to unicycle. She accepted my ukulele playing, but this is apparently too far!
←Rate | 11-04-2010 22:12 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey girl look at you with all those curves, and me with no brakes.
←Rate | 02-22-2011 07:22 by Master Weeg Comments (0)  


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